Self-Image is the single most important aspect of our lives. The best analogy for this is that our Self-Image is like our central nervous system to our body. It controls everything about us. To know the importance of this is critical because your business, career, relationships, and anything else in your life will never outgrow your Self-Image!  I am going to outline 12 different points on how you can have the Self-Image of a Rockstar!

1. Appearance: When you look good, you feel good! Put on that sharp shirt with dress pants and look in the mirror and you feel like a million bucks don’t you? We have all done that before. When you feel good about how you look, your Self-Image will go up and you will walk and talk with greater confidence.

This can also translate over to your vehicle or home. Keeping a dirty car where you have old french fries from two months ago or a messy house is a very good indicator on how you perceive yourself. Don’t you get a great feeling when you get into your clean car regardless of  how old it is or walk into your clean fresh smelling house? Clean up and feel good!

2. Posture: You can increase your Self-Image simply by how you carry yourself. Walk with your chest out and your chin up; like you own the room. Sit upright and uncross your arms. These are all ways in which you can not only raise your Self-Image, but also show others and attract people to you because you have that air of confidence. Study the way successful people you know carry themselves. When was the last time you saw a successful person walking with their shoulders slumped and looking down at their shoes? They all have a posture about them; usually a brisk walk like they are going somewhere- which they are!

Another key aspect of posture is looking people in their eyes. I don’t mean the type of stare where you don’t blink, but looking at people in the eyes when you are talking to them or listening. It amazes me how many people that do not look me in the eyes when I speak with them. Instantly I know that they have a bit of a Self-Image issue.

Speak with confidence. Doesn’t it drive you nuts when you are trying to converse with somebody who has no confidence and they are speaking with little more than a slight mumble? You have to keep asking them to re-state what they just said until you get so sick of it you start nodding your head as if you actually are hearing them. Speak loud and bold so that others can hear you. You may ask “What if I say something wrong?” Who cares!! At least you said it with confidence!

3. Be on time: Nothing shows more disrespect for somebody’s time than showing up late. It also has a negative impact on your Self-Image. It may not seem like a big deal, but you know the feeling that I am talking about; you arrive at a meeting late and open the door and all of the heads turn to you and you reply- “I’m sorry that I am late.” Your Self-Image just took a hit. Be accountable. Leave for your appointment a few minutes early and arrive 5-10 minutes before- even family events. By your actions you are saying “I feel good about myself and care about our appointment.”

4. Manage your money well: This can be tied back into #3 about being accountable. Make sure you are aware of your money and paying your bills, etc. on time. When all of your bills are paid for and you are accountable, you will feel better about yourself. I can remember getting call after call from bill collectors about money that I owed. Needless to say when I got off the phone I didn’t exactly feel good. I felt lower than a pregnant ant! If you have made a commitment to pay for something or give money to someone for an event or tickets, etc- pay them. Guilt will lower your Self-Image.

5. Do what you are supposed to do consistently: We all have responsibilities in our lives and are being pulled in a thousand different directions from our family to careers to friends. Many times we do not want to do what we know we should or have to do. Resisting the temptation to put these things off and doing them even when we don’t feel like it will enhance your Self-Image. Have you started a work out regimen or gone on a diet recently? The first couple of weeks when you work out you feel tired and sore; not really the combination that screams to go to the gym! After a couple of weeks of consistently going to the gym, you actually change your perspective on working out. You feel as though you can’t go a day without working out! The same is true with dieting or cutting out sugar. The first few days/weeks are miserable but then you get to the point where you don’t even crave or want sugar. If you don’t do the things you should do or are not overcoming obstacles, your Self-Image will go backward. Remember, Success = Right Habits!

6. Progressive Goals: Another way to increase your Self-Image is to have progressive goals. These are goals that you increase every month. For example, if you are in sales your progressive goals may be to increase your monthly sales by X%. It may be that you are able to run for 2 miles before you get tired and your goal for next month would be to run 4 miles. These continual goals helps you to move forward and develop the habit of winning which will raise your Self-Image!

7. Pay the full price not the minimum price: Paying a price and overcoming obstacles will raise your Self-Image. Going through struggles will help you to see what you are made of. Too many people look to take the short cut or the paved road of simplicity only to find out that the reward was little to nothing. See how productive you can be- test yourself and you will be surprised how far you can go. Keep in mind that your reward is directly proportioned to the price you pay. The bigger the price, the bigger the reward. Increase your price and you will increase your Self-Image!

8. Don’t speak negative about yourself: Do you cringe like me whenever you hear someone say I can’t do this or I’m not good at that? I hate it! Never speak negative about yourself. Our brains are the greatest computer ever created. It can formulate ideas and solve problems in fractions of a second. However, it is easily programmed to listen to and accept any negative things we say about ourself. Our brain can not decipher whether or not you mean what you say but it takes everything we say to it literally. When you say things like “I am not good with people” or “I can’t remember names” you are programming yourself to do just that. It is just as easy to say that you are good with people or you are good at remembering names. Take the lid off of your capabilities and believe in yourself; this will raise your Self-Image. Speak positive about yourself and your brain will have nothing else to do but have you feeling good about you.

9. Spend time with people that have better Self-Images than you: Get around other individuals who have a high Self-Image. It may be a little bit intimidating at first, but the results will be well worth it. By getting around confident people, you can study how they dress, walk, speak, carry themselves, hear what they talk about, and most importantly, see what they don’t talk about. If you model people with a higher Self-Image than you, your Self-Image will go up as you start adopting their habits and attitudes.

10. Realize that action is the only thing that cures fear: Do what you fear a lot and you will get good at it. You may say that “I can’t talk in front of people.” Well for starters, refer back to topic #8, but how do you know you can’t unless you try it and work at it. Many people were raised to think that if it hurts or feels uncomfortable, stop doing it. My mentor has always said that pain is weakness leaving the body. If you start taking action on what you fear, your Self-Image will rise.Change is taking deliberate, proactive action outside of your comfort zone. Make the changes today and watch your Self-Image soar!

11.  Self-education: Self improvement education goes a long way to increasing and maintaining your Self-Image. I recommend reading positive books and listening to positive audios. Books change you from the inside out. It is like having a personal conversation with the author on how great you are and how you can improve yourself. Audios on the other hand, can help to program your thoughts and attitudes. Be careful what you allow into your mind. Lyrics to songs can be a hindrance to your Self-Image. The beat may be good, but if the song is speaking of negative things or when you sing along with the song, you are putting yourself down, your Self-Image will go down as well. Remember, your brain can not tell the difference- it only acts on the words that you tell it.

12. Build other people’s Self-Image: Build the Self-Image of others around your daily. Notice the little things about someone such as a nice shirt that they are wearing, or maybe they spoke up and made a good point in a meeting that you admired. Your Self-Image will go up when you look for positive qualities in others because you will work to look for the positive in yourself; it becomes a habit! When you serve others, your Self-Image goes up. So take your eyes off of yourself and put it on others.

It is with sincere hope that this article has helped you in some way. Whether you had a very low Self-Image before you read this post, or you were just trying to see how you can improve the good Self-Image you currently have, you must continue to work on yourself on a daily basis.

You may be overwhelmed and thinking how can I possibly do all 12 of these things to improve my Self-Image. My recommendation to you is to start with 1 or 2 topics at a time and work on them for several days until you feel that you have made progress. Then move on to another set. Your Self-Image did not form over night and therefore, will not change over night either. Take it a day at a time and bit by bit you will feel better about yourself.

I do not claim to be the Self-Image guru and, like everyone else, I battle and have to continually work on my Self-Image. When you understand and implement the tools and strategies that I have spelled out above, it is a battle you can be confident of winning!

Please share with me strategies and/or stories of how you have raised your Self-Image! I would love your feedback.

To your Success!

Kenneth Cloutier